How to let go of what no longer serves us

A vibrant sunset with orange, yellow, blue, purple and pink hues to inspire connection with the energy around us

October has come in with a bang this year. It has brought with it the strong energies that started in late September and has built on them. When energies come up like this on the earth, they bring with them an opportunity to release what doesn’t serve us. What doesn’t serve you? Maybe it’s the late night chocolate bar, self-critical thinking, a relationship/friendship that does more harm than good. Whatever comes to mind is ready to be released now.

However, releasing is not the act of getting rid of something because we don’t like it. Releasing is about accepting ourselves as we are and choosing a different path – one that is freer and more expansive. It’s choosing to change. Are you ready to make that change? Let’s use the example of self criticism: “That was really dumb what I said in the meeting,” “Why can’t I control my anger around my kids?” or “I hate this extra weight around my waste.”

How would letting go of critical thoughts change your day to day life? What would you be able to feel? What would you be able to achieve? Although it sounds like letting go of critical thinking would be wonderful, there is a real fear keeping us from getting there. Otherwise, why wouldn’t you be there already?

So let’s explore that fear of letting ourselves be great and believing it. What would it mean to accept yourself exactly as you are? If you let go of all the things you hold against yourself, would that make you likely to repeat those things that you held against yourself? The answer is actually no, although fear here often clings to the idea that if we forgive ourselves, if we really let go of those criticisms, we will repeat the same ‘mistakes.’ The first step here is recognizing that the fear of repeating the ‘mistake’ is what fuels the self-criticism, and it is this same fear that keeps us perpetuating the ‘mistake’ over and over again. The mind tells us we need to hold onto the fear to avoid repeating and action, but it is really the repetition of the fear in the mind that keeps us repeating the action.

So how do you let go of the fear? We need to recognize it. We need to understand it. We need to love the child inside of us that adopted that fear because he/she/they believed it would protect them. Only when we fully love and accept that part of us that holds onto the fear will it feel safe enough to let the fear go. It requires introspection. And it requires us to feel. We need to feel the fear and any other not-so-nice emotions that are wrapped up in it. We need to feel this fully with the whole body to process it and set it free. That’s what release is, a setting free.

When we come from the perspective of trying to banish an action or a thought that is rooted in fear, we are simply creating resistance. We are basically saying, “This thought/action is not okay and I reject it.” When we do this, we also reject the part of us that is holding onto the fear. That’s why it is so important to set an intention of where we want to be and how we want to feel. Tapping into those feelings can give you the support and strength you need to dig deep and love the part of us that is holding onto our fears. Then we can take the time to feel them and truly set them free.

So how do you want to feel?

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